It's true that when it comes to men, you should always believe their actions before you believe their words.

But what if a man cannot say the words? What if he can't say "I love you"?

Here's what two women want you to know:

"Margaret" says: "Actions are not always better than words...I thought so too until recently.

"I've been dating a man for 6 years who treated me better than my ex-husband or any other man, but he had a problem saying it. I thought because he acted the part, he did love me, but he didn't.

"He's ended the relationship because after 6 years he doesn't feel love for me. Don't let women set themselves up for this heartbreak... You must have the action and the words."

"Angela" says: "I am in a relationship with a man who refuses to tell me he loves me and will only admit he has any sort of feelings for me when I complain.

"We have been dating for nearly 5 months now and he has recently been offered a job in another state. He didn't ask me to go along, probably because he knows I have obligations here I wouldn't leave behind.

"So when he does go, I will be back on the dating scene again, looking for Mr. Right. What Mimi Tanner says about how your man perceives you at the beginning of a relationship is right on.

"My current beau and I were instantly physically attracted to each other and it was, and continues to be, very steamy! Outside the bedroom however, it's ice cold.

"I want to try to gain a better balance next time. I need passion, but I also need to hear those sweet nothings that aren't only about sex."

Could things have been different?

When a man loves you and does not have serious inner conflicts about love, he will tell you. It does not have to be a stuggle, or complicated. If you realize that with your man, it IS going to be a struggle, you then have a choice as to whether you are going to participate in the struggle, or move on.

If you choose to move on, don't be bitter toward him - that will leave bad memories for both of you, and it also burns your bridges - which is almost never a smart move.

You do have great influence on how things go with your man. Don't project any expectations of things going badly. Behave like a woman who is accustomed to being adored - not burned. It will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.