Beware of George Bush, a suspected terrorist. For years now, George Bush has been attempting to instill fear into his fellow Americans. He's interfered with two free Democratic elections, and concerns are rising that America's Democracy is rapidly thinning. While spreading Democracy to other nations, George Bush has used up some American Democracy; soon there won't be any left for the United States. Many American constituents think that he should be spreading peanut butter or jelly overseas, rather than Democracy, which was highly valued by most other American Presidents.

George Bush has been terrorizing the American people ever since his face was first made public, but after his terroristic activity in two separate elections, it's believed that soon he'll achieve "Warlord" status. With the help of his accomplices, or cronies as he likes to call them, he's managed to repeatedly evade capture. It's believed that he's getting advice from a former associate who goes by the name of Osama Bin Laden.

Every time George Bush mispronounces a word, it's believed to be a signal to other terrorists to plant propaganda into the media which would support his wild claims. Bush's chief adversary is Representative Jack Murtha from Pennsylvania. Jack Murtha is dedicated to fighting for truth, justice, and the American way; Murtha is believed to be a superhero whose DNA has been altered. His super powers include the ability to speak the truth while others in positions of authority remain silent. Jack Murtha has vowed to "rid America of terrorists." We can only hope that George Bush is at the top of Murtha's list. By night, Jack is not available for comment due to his superhero activities. His secret identity now public, we must hope that SuperMurtha is not thwarted by the Green Goblin or Doctor Doom until he's had a chance to secure America's freedom. By ridding America of George Bush, its greatest enemy, Murtha will show that with great power comes great responsibility. It's a concept Jack learned from his Uncle Ben long ago, while living with Aunt May, who -- ironically -- was a Republican at birth.

On some person-on-the-street interviews, one man, Jerry, stated, "I don't really know why he bothers talking anymore. No one believes him. Sometimes I think I'm watching a weather report forecasting high heat and gusting winds, but once I look at the television, I see that it's just George Bush making another speech."

Elaine commented, "Bush's face looks a little droopy, like Droopy Dog, but his words frighten me terribly. I hope another country will invade and occupy America long enough to end his reign of terror over the American people. He deserves to go on trial for his war crimes, and for taking away our Democracy to give to other nations."

In a poll, 99% of Americans indicated that being lied to by their President is unacceptable. One percent didn't mind, and enjoyed directly, indirectly, or discreetly working for President Bush. Fifty percent of the 1% asked if I knew any good lawyers, but walked away, appearing terrified.